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Saturday, September 3, 2011




I am a 24 year old closeted homosexual and I am deeply in love with a fellow student of mine for almost a year now. The problem is that he seems to be straight, in fact one of the straightest guys I have ever met. He has a girlfriend; he is always staring at women on the street and has a very masculine behavior. I haven't told him that I am gay, but I believe it has at least crossed his mind, since I have no girlfriend, don't talk about girls and I am generally “different”.

However, I feel that he is flirting with me all the time. The first time I felt that, I was sitting on a stall when he came behind me, slightly pressed his body against my back and started playing with my hair. At that time, I had known him for only two months and we hadn’t been any close at all. We had simply talked a few times, so his behavior seemed very weird to me. In the next months, he continued this kind of behavior.

He is often touching me, hugging me, pinching my belly, caressing my hair, my back and my chest and winking at me. Once at a club, his lips slightly touched my ear while talking to me. When he is talking to me, he comes really close, so close that I can feel his breath. Sometimes he is holding my chin while talking to me. He knows that I like his caressing, he has actually mentioned that.

In addition, he is always making jokes about me being gay, in front of the other students. He is supposedly saying all that for fun, but he does that all the time and I don’t think it is coincidental. On the other hand, when the two of us are talking he is very kind, supporting and he is taking care of me.

Over the months I have truly fallen in love with him. I like the fact that he is totally different from me; I am always shy and quiet while he is extroverted, strong and courageous. I can’t stop thinking of him all the time and this has become very painful because I do not dare express my feelings to him.

Why do you think is he acting like that? Do you think his behavior crosses the line of acceptable physical contact between two (not that close) friends or is it just normal? Does he feel anything for me or is he just playing?



Hi George

Well, I think we've all been in a similar situation before, and it can truly be difficult to decipher all the signals.

I think the key in this case is that you said he is very extroverted, strong and courageous. It sounds to me like he's just one of those personalities that is very expressive and probably acts similarly towards most everyone, or at least the people he feels comfortable with. It doesn't necesssarily mean he's gay, or that he has any romantic interest in you.

Just because you're not all that close doesn't make it unusual either. It could just be that he really likes you (as a friend) and wants to be closer friends. It's also entirely possible that even though he's straight, he still very much likes the attention and probably knows that you're crushing on him, and so he's fostering that. Doesn't make him a bad person, he just likes the attention, and he's probably completely comfortable with it.

It's tough, but I wouldn't allow yourself to continue fantasizing about something that's not likely to ever materialize. Find someone who feels the same about you in return, and then you'll have reason to be giddy as a schoolgirl!

Take care,


Source: http://en.allexperts.com/q/Gay-Life-3136/love-straight-guy.htm

1 comment:

  1. Yeah. I experienced the same thing. I would even face him as I become ready.


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